“The Problem Is, Too Many #-*-# Are Rooting!’.

Returning from the West Coast at the weekend, I stopped off for a bit of a poke around Reefton. I hadn’t really had a good look around here before, and personally think it is one of NZ’s hidden gems. Full of character, nostalgia, plus it has one of the countries best skate parks (go figure!).

I took a slight detour out of town, and was drawn to a back yard of rusted cars hulks, strewn derelict about the grounds of a old weatherboard house. While some were encroached by thorns and scrub, others were lying neglected on a freshly mown lawn. None however would ever see the open road ever again I am sure. (Though many would be a vintage car restorers dream if they were ever to be salvaged).

It was here I met K.D.

“The problem is, you know, too many  #-*-# are rooting!’.

Without knowing just how much truth there might have been from mystery, I got chatting, and think we solved many of the world’s problems. I did have many a good laugh, such as his rationale above why the world was in such a mess. KD was a quite a character. A real salt of the earth, working man. The language was colourful, and his views opinionated. Yet, this was refreshing given we normally live in a very PC world.

With a working life spent about the Reefton, in forestry and deer recovery, I stumbled upon a true Coaster here. I can’t be sure of his age. Before I know it I had a tour of the house (close to a hoarders house as I have ever seen!), got to handle his prized vice grips (“You can do anything with those bastards”), and his pride and joy, an old but trusted Land Rover (“You wouldn’t believe the —– places I took that —–“!). I even got to see his special the home made wasp extractor (“I’m going to get those bastards soon”, pointing an aged hoover vacuum cleaner with adapted funnel, to a wasp nest in the garage).

But the joy was when he started recalling pioneering days of deer recovery. Out came the deer net, custom made in the 1960’s from an old .303 rifle, firing blanks to shoot a net for live deer recovery. Then came his old rifle (“That —— has shot thousands of deer, that bastard”), complete with Araldite (“Well, it broke in a chopper accident, so I had to fix it a bit”), and adapted magazine (“The original only held 4 rounds, but that’s no —— use when you are up in a chopper surrounded by deer. I made this one instead”, pointing to the welded 10 shot mag he’d constructed).

“KD, can I send you some photos? Do you have an email”

“What the — would I have an email for? I don’t even have a computer. —- that!”.

Maybe, I’ll just have to go old school and make hard copies.

I wonder if the postman will get to see his guns?